AAAAACHHOOOOOO. Ugh.

I decided I wanted to make a blog post. That's really how most (if not all) of my blog posts come into being. I just randomly decide I want to make one and I just do it. What if children happened that way? Someone just decides they want one, and then boom, there one is. It's a good thing the making of children takes much more cooperation. ahem. 

For the purposes of this post, however, I think I want to ramble about sneezes. 

David has just sneezed roughly twenty times in a thirty second time frame. I believe that is a problem he should go get looked at. 

I hate sneezes. 

I hate having to sneeze when I'm talking to people. And that is always when I have to sneeze the most. When I'm all by myself, sneezes never take the time to come upon me. It is only when I'm in the middle of a sentence or a quiet room that they think I deserve to sneeze. I hate it when people sneeze on me. It's gross. In sophomore year of high school, I had a job watching about fifteen two year olds once a week. They always sneezed on me. Little kid sneezes are far from cute. They're gross. I think that experience scarred me for life, as well as giving me an anti-sneeze bias. 

I always feel bad for people with lots of allergies, who sneeze constantly. Being in a room with them and all their sneezes makes me very claustrophobic. I once knew a boy who sneezed ten times in a row without stopping. I couldn't stand it. 

Whoever invented sneezing anyway? It's really one of the odder functions of the human body. Couldn't we survive with coughs alone? Coughs don't bother me. You and I can cough all we want. Just please, no sneezing. 

The moment leading up to a sneeze is the worst. You know it's coming, and you're frightened. The anticipation leading up to the culminating moment of the actual, physical sneeze is one of the most stress-filled, phobia inducing anticipations one can experience. There is really very little you can do to stop it. Even if you do manage to stop it this time, it's only going to come back in a few hours at the most. And when it comes back, it's going to be bigger and more obnoxious than before. Oh the anticipation. If we could do without the anticipation, then thirty percent of the problem would be solved. The other seventy percent is the sneezes themselves. 

I guess there really isn't anyone I can blame for sneezes, though. I think that's what upsets me the most about them. It's somewhat of a comfort if you can get angry at something or someone in specific. Actually, it's very comforting to be able to do that. I haven't sneezed since last night, though, so hopefully I can go the entire day without sneezing. I'm going to beat the system on this one. I'll let you know how I do.