First Impressions.

I've basically grown up at church. I've been attending and involved for as long as I can remember. I honestly can't think back to a time when church hasn't been a HUGE part of my life. There's a lot of who I am that stemmed from the things that I've learned and experienced through church. There's a lot of friendships I've made through church activities that I know I'll maintain throughout the rest of life. 

That said, the church is so ridiculous so much of the time. 

And I mean that in the most respectful way possible. 

For the most part, the members of the church are insanely judgemental. It's absolutely revolting how the people found inside of the walls of a church are easily the most judgemental and condescending people you could find, at least 85% of the time. 

How is that even possible?

Based on everything I've learned in church, the church should be a place full of vibrant, genuine and loving people. The church has even taught me that the Bible makes it clear that God is in the only one who is in a position to pass judgement on people. Other people are simply not equipped to pass this judgement. 

I hate how unloving the vast majority of the Christian community is, especially the sect which would identify themselves as "traditional", "fundamental", or "conservative". 

I think that attitude has everything to do with my general sense of distaste for those three aforementioned words. 

So many times people act like the only people who deserve their respect are other Christians who would label themselves as such.

Honestly, that's ridiculous. 

Ugh. It just disgusts me so much. I really don't blame people for being turned off of Christianity and church. If it hadn't been such an integral part of my life from such an early age, I might very easily be turned off of it myself. And maybe to some extent I am.  Perhaps I'm unjustly passing judgement on the Christian community, percieving a mind set that might not even be close to reality. Based on what I hear from people outside of the church, though, it's perfectly accurate. Maybe I really am cynical towards the general population of church-going, conservative, fundamentalist Christians. Maybe this is even my own way of judging others.

And maybe that's harsh. 

All I know is that I've been able to disassociate God from the broken institution that is the church, so that my own faith isn't affected by the attitudes I see around me. I still do consider myself a Christian. I simply do not want to be categorized as the stereotypical and all to common judgemental Christian.

In church, you're always taught to live your life different from the rest of the world. I'm not satisfied just living differently from the general population of people, though. I want to live differently from the general population of Christians, too. 

"We have too many high sounding words, and too few actions that correspond with them." [Abigail Adams]